On nearly mowing down a jogger with a vehicle...

"You know what- I did him a favor. He really values his life now."

Free Labor

"He was, he was very nice, and sweet"
"Yeah, I just wish you could've smelled my intern though"

Love Means Compromise

"I need to find someone to see that movie with, and it can't be him."
"Why not? Because you'll fall in looove with him???"
"Yes, fall in love with him, tell him I want to have his babies, and probably even raise them."